透过他们思考的方式来建立解决方案

让我们从下两个前提开始(从最初的前提列表),它们定义并描述了以解决方案取向的大成教练:

#3 解决方案是心理-情绪地图的功能

#4   解决方案是从思考、意义制作以及整合构成的。

 

从这些解决方案原则,解决方案由人的思维模式构建。毕竟,如果不能「思考」解决方案,他们就无法「执行」解决方案。最终,他们必须表象它并框定它。这就为你提供了与客户一起探索的几个领域。

  • 这个人的思维模式(处事模式)是什么?
  • 你在这个人的思维中发现了哪些认知扭曲和/或谬误?
  • 这个人的谈话和思考有哪些认知偏见是明显的?
  • 当你后退并推断这个人谈话中隐含的东西时,他做出了哪些假设?

为了共同创造一个解决方案 – 每当你听到一个让你感到特别有意义的想法时,使用确认。它可能让你觉得是解决方案,也可能让你觉得是问题。确认任何可能表明处事模式、认知偏见或认知扭曲的想法。确认好的、坏的、丑陋的。就直接问他。在这一点上,不要挑战它,一开始不要。首先,只要把注意力引到思考上。通常情况下,客户会立即对你的确认做出反应。当他们听到自己的话被外化时,他们会感到惊讶,甚至震惊。

  • 「我说的? !」
  • 「当你这么说的时候,听起来很傻。」
  • 「嗯,不完全是,我应该说…」

当你确认时,你经常把那些几乎无意识的,甚至无意识的东西带入全意识。这往往是客户的警钟。它可能揭示一个老旧的后催眠暗示(post-hypnotic suggestion)和停止那个老旧的恍惚状态。它可能可以去除催眠!你所做的是让想法变得可见。

 

这里有另一个解决方案取向的动态和技能。我们的大多数想法都是隐形的 – 甚至对我们自己来说也是如此。毕竟,你和我想得如此之快,如此不自觉,远远快于我们把所有的想法都变成文字的速度。因此,当你提问并让客户回答时,你是在帮助她使她的想法变得可见 – 不仅对你可见,甚至对她也可见。这扩展了自我意识,伴随着这种内在意识而来的是选择。

 

这时,一旦你让这个人的想法可见,你就可以决定「想法本身」是不是问题,是否需要一个解决方案。这是常有的事。思考的框架是问题,而不是人。这个人正在用制造障碍和干扰的思考方式。这就是把处事模式和语言检定模式问题当作最好教练工具的地方。现在,你可以扩展处事模式或提出以相反的处事模式为前提的问题。现在,你可以问一些具体的问题,使他能够重新映射他已经做出的结论。这一切都是因为解决方案是我们的心理-情绪地图的功能。所以当你帮助那个人重新映射的时候,你的客户可以开始创建一个有效的心理和情绪地图。

 

第四个前提同样描述了解决方案取向的过程:解决方案由思考、意义制作和整合构成的。当你让这个人的想法可见时,你就能知道问题是出在意义上,还是创造问题的意义制作类型。有了这些,你就可以转向信念改变、换框、大脑到肌肉模式和其他介入模式。

 

最终,解决方案是想法、建议,甚至是完整的策略。我们透过新的和不同的思考方法来解决问题。我们透过新设框的方法来解决问题。成为一个专注于解决方案的大成教练,你要让客户的想法变得可见。然后你们两个就会对如何开发一个解决方案有很好的想法。

想要更多的解决方案吗?请参阅《Creative Solutions》(2017)以及《Executive Thinking 》(2018)。

 

Solution Building via The Way They Think

 

Let us start with the next two premises (from that original list of premises) that define and describe solution focused Meta-Coaching:

#3. Solutions are functions of our mental-emotional maps.

#4. Solutions are constructed from thinking, meaning-making, and integrating.

 

From these solution principles, the solution will be constructed from the person’s thinking patterns.  After all, if they can’t think the solution, they won’t be able to do the solution.  Ultimately they have to represent it and frame it.  That gives you several areas to explore with your client.

∙            What are the person’s thinking patterns (meta-programs)?

∙            What cognitive distortions and/or fallacies do you detect in the person’s thinking?

∙            What cognitive biases are evident in the person’s talking and thinking?

∙            As you step back and infer what’s implied in the person’s talk, what assumptions are being made?

To co-create a solution— use acknowledgments whenever you hear a piece of thinking that strikes you as particularly significant. It might strike you as the solution, it might strike you as the problem. Acknowledge any piece of thinking that might indicate a meta-program, a cognitive bias or cognitive distortion. Acknowledge the good, the bad, the ugly.  Just ask.  At this point, do not challenge it, not at first. First simply draw attention to the thinking.  Often clients will immediately react to your acknowledgment. They will be surprised, even shocked, when they hear their words externalized.

  • “I said that?!”
  • “That sounds silly when you say it.”
  • “Well, not really, I should have said …”

When you acknowledge, you often bring what may be barely conscious, even unconscious, into full consciousness. It is often a wake up call for your client. It may bring an old post-hypnotic suggestion to light and break that old trance. It may de-hypnotize! What you are doing is making the thinking visible.

 

Here’s another solution focus dynamic and skill.  Most of our thinking is invisible—even to us. After all, you and I can think so fast and so unconsciously, far faster than we can turn all of the thoughts into words. So when you ask questions and get a client to speak, you are helping that person to make her thoughts visible— visible not only to you, but even to them.  This expands self-awareness and with that inner awareness comes choice.

 

Now once you have made the person’s thinking visible, you are in a position to determine if “the thinking itself” is the problem and needs a solution.  This is often the case. The frame of thinking is the problem, not the person. The person is using a way of thinking that creates the blocks and interferences. This is where the Meta-Programs Model and the Meta-Model Questions become some of your very best coaching tools. Now you can expand meta-programs or ask questions that presuppose the opposite meta-program. Now you can ask specificity questions to enable the person to re-map the conclusions which the person has made. All of this is because Solutions are functions of our mental-emotional maps. So when you help the person re-map, your client can begin to create a mental and emotional map that will work.

 

The fourth premise similarly describes the solution focus process: Solutions are constructed from thinking, meaning-making, and integrating. As you make the person’s thinking visible, you can then tell if is the meaning that’s the problem or the kind of meaning-making that created the problem. And with that, you can move to belief change, reframing, mind-to-muscling, and other patterns for intervention.

 

Ultimately, solutions are ideas, suggestions, or even full fledged strategies. We solve things by thinking in new and different ways. We solve things by framing things in a new way. To be a solution focused Meta-Coach– work to make your client’s thinking visible. Then both of you will have a pretty good idea about how to develop a solution.

 

Want more about solutions? See Creative Solutions (2017) as well as Executive Thinking (2018).